𝓵𝓪𝓫𝔂𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓱𝓾𝓶 ❀ 𝓲𝓷𝓫𝓸𝔁

[girlybruiser]

ＩＮＢＯＸ 𝕥𝕖𝕩𝕥 💬 ✦ 𝕒𝕦𝕕𝕚𝕠 📞 ✦ 𝕧𝕚𝕕𝕖𝕠 📹 ✦ 𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 🎬 𝕔𝕠𝕕𝕖 𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕚𝕥

Comments

[petsthedog]

it really ain't that big a deal
pretty much got nothin but time around here

[An indefinite stretch of time, with no forthcoming ending. That's the most difficult part of life here, he finds.]

[girlybruiser]

[ There's a few minutes where there's no response, Haru ruminating over what to say. It's a bit awkward, but maybe she should revisit their previous conversation. ]

I'm sorry if I overstepped earlier.
I assume that is still bothering you.

[petsthedog]

[Ah...]

look you didn't do anything wrong
i don't agree with you but i overreacted

[The typing dots appear and disappear for a while, like he's wrestling with saying something else. They stop entirely for about thirty more seconds after that, before appearing again. This time, though, when they go, there's a new message.]

i just didn't like that i stressed you out bad enough that you felt safer walking back alone
i'm a shitty guy but acting like that ain't like me
so again, i'm the one that's sorry, alright
you don't need to feel obligated to talk to me, either
really did only want to check if you were okay but if you'd left me on read i'd get it

[girlybruiser]

[ She isn't sure what to say to that, if only because she doesn't fully believe Shinjiro could be a "shitty" guy. Not when Akihiko speaks so fondly of him. ]

I am alright, thank you. Those two that bothered me are likely trying to intimidate me into staying away from future trials involving them and their gang.
But I will not be bullied into submission by such people.
That said, I do not think you are a bad person either, Aragaki-san.

[petsthedog]

that's good to hear
if you need a hand again you can call me if you want

anyway
depends on your point of view i guess
but i ain't exactly a good one however you slice it

[girlybruiser]

Because of what happened to Amada-san's mother?

[petsthedog]

sure
there's more than just that, though

[girlybruiser]

I will not pretend I know much outside of what I had seen on Sleepr and what Amada-san and Akihiko-kun have told me.
But I don't think it's true that you are a bad person.
In fact, I think you are a kind person.

[ Kind is an important distinction here; being nice is something else. ]

You saw me in trouble and you stepped in. You are checking in on me now.
I don't believe someone who is bad would do such a thing.

[petsthedog]

[Hngh...this is Takeba all over again. He can't even immediately deny that he did it out of a desire to help, either, given that -- well. He's already copped to wanting to know she was alright.]

people ain't that simple
doing a decent thing or two doesn't erase anything else
sure i ain't some kind of mustache-twirling nutjob but that's still not the same as actually bein a good guy

[girlybruiser]

No, they are not.
The last time I tried to extend my sympathies to someone, they were quite upset with me.

[ Putting it lightly. ]

Would Akihiko-kun befriend someone who he didn't consider a good person?
Would Amada-san also want to talk with you if he felt similarly?

[ More rhetorical than anything else. Haru is confident in her belief Shinjiro is just struggling and needs to figure it out on his own. ]

[petsthedog]

[Upset, huh. Sounds like a hell of a story. Might explain why she was in such a rush to get away from him, too. He decides not to comment.]

aki and i met when we were 4
he’s always gonna be biased
and like i said before, amada feels guilty for what happened to me
he hated me before that

[girlybruiser]

[ Akechi screamed at Akira and said he hated him, then tried to kill him, like... twice. Three times, maybe.

Now they live together under the same roof. Shinji pls. ]

People's feelings can change.
Besides, I think it's a disservice to Amada-san to think he is not capable of growth and maturity in spite what's happened to him.

[petsthedog]

i'm not sayin he ain't

[It's what he'd hoped for the kid, in the end; that he would be able to finally find closure and heal with him out of the picture. But then he got dragged out of his grave, and -- everything's so complicated now.]

just that he and aki ain't gonna reasonable judges of who i am either
there's too much history, it's too complicated

[girlybruiser]

I'm sorry, but isn't Akihiko-kun the best judge of character in this case?

[petsthedog]

no
he wants to see the best in me because we only had each other for the longest time
but i ain't the guy he grew up with anymore

[That Shinjiro Aragaki has been dead as long as Amada's mother has. What's left is a barely shambling corpse that's only just started trying to remember how to be alive again.]

[girlybruiser]

[ A few minutes pass before she responds to that. ]

I suppose that is something you both will have to work through together.
I will say one thing, Aragaki-san: hate is a strong word.
I can tell you... I lost a parent like Amada-san. The circumstances are not precisely the same, but mine was ripped from me violently and suddenly. And the party responsible... even after everything, I don't hate them.
I don't think I ever could.

[ Shido might be closest to that feeling for her, but justice prevailed at the end of the day. She's avenged her father and the waves of grief and anger that come and go while dealing with the other is another story.

But hatred? Hatred is not a part of that tale. ]

[petsthedog]

[Likewise, he chews on that a few minutes himself.]

i don't mind however he feels about me
that's his decision, just like your feelings're yours
nobody else's got the right to a say on that
i just don't wanna give anyone the wrong idea about me, is all
i've disappointed enough people in my life already, y'know?

[girlybruiser]

That is something you will need to face within yourself, Aragaki-san. That is what I believe.
I apologize I could not be any more help here, but I do believe one's conviction in their heart must be determined on their own.

[ Even with her newfound friends behind her, Milady had to awaken from Haru's will of rebellion and strength of her heart and convictions. ]

[petsthedog]

i mean, it ain't like i'm confused about it or anything
i'm just sayin that it's more complicated than bein a good guy or a bad one
made a lot of mistakes i can't take back, and i ain't always an easy guy to be around or talk to
i'd rather people understand that much before goin and makin assumptions based on some one off thing or other, that's all

but i ain't about to waste your time arguing about it, either
so however you want to think of me is fine, too

wrapped!

[girlybruiser]

Perhaps I am not in a place to say much then, Aragaki-san.
Thank you for checking in on me. I do appreciate that, I assure you.
Please have a good night.